Dating is SO Complicated.com

Bitch (bic̸h) noun

A term for the female of a canine species in general. It is also frequently used as a term for a malicious, spiteful, domineering, intrusive, or unpleasant person, especially a woman.

Best Friends for life.. That would be the first thing on every woman’s mind when they see Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda on the big screen. Yep the second blockbuster movie is out this month and the four girls are still giggling continuously. Sex and the City show has run for more than 10 years and we’ve seen the girls stick through thick and thin throughout the period. Men, sex, shoes, babies, and pills conversations are always the hot topics. Yet in real life, Kim Catrall (Samanta) is constantly bickering with SJP (Carrie). It’s all non-sense, it does not happen in today’s society. Which make me thinking.. does long term friendship exist in modern female world?

Women are no different than men in terms of competition. They compete about everything from partner, career, body-wise, looks, even social and sex life. Who’s got the hottest body, who snatches the sexiest man, who owns an attractive face, who has the most satisfying job, or who experienced the big ‘OMFG’ in a week.

In most cases, there are more and more bitchiness within female friendships. When we were little, women are taught to be loyal to their girlfriends (and husbands). They braid each other’s hair then pulling each other as they got older. They first keep your secrets but told everyone how many men you slept with later on. They bring you flowers when you broke up with your first boyfriend, only to realize they hook up with your ex sometime in the future.

As you grow older, you begin to sort out which ones are toxic or beneficial friends. Admit it – you’re hot, fabolous, successful, wanted by men, amazing in bed, not forgetting you have a wonderful personality. Chances are, other (insecure) ladies will be green of envy of your qualities. Those women will always try to bring you down, imitate your personality, talk behind your back, or even try to steal your man.

Screening for a good female pal who won’t be jealous of you and be your true BFF seems totally challenging. Acquiring friends is easy, but maintaining sweet girlfriendship is hard. More often than not, females don’t tell other females what they don’t like about them. They prefer to ‘discuss’ about it with another person..behind their back of course!

Women should be trained on how to communicate openly with their female pals. Like the girls on SATC, they can just blurt out almost about everything whenever they catch up for coffee or dinners. Whether it’s “I don’t like you tagging me on all my Facebook photos” or “I think your ass looks saggy” – just throw them on the table. No backstabbing, no badmouthing, no gossiping about your friend. If you have something not nice to say about your gal pal, say it to them upfront. Bitching about them is so 2008. What you want is a healthy relationship with your girlfriends.

A good girlfriend is the one who genuinely support you, cares for you, be your shoulder to cry and does not laugh at your misfortune. Likewise if your girlfriend does not appear to have those qualities, you have a choice.. keep your friends close, keep your bitches closer.

What if you had a second chance to find true love..

That was the tagline of a chick flick drama titled Letters to Juliet. Starring Sophie, a (half) engaged woman who flew to Verona in Italy with her fiancé for a pre-honeymoon holiday. However their plans changed and Sophie found herself glancing through a memorial spot for women to write letters in order to find their true love.

She came across one letter written by Claire in England dated 50 years ago. Sophie wrote back to Claire, and few weeks later Claire came to Verona. She wishes to find her missing lover, Lorenzo. From there on Sophie accompanied Claire (who came with her grandson Charlie) to find 74 different Lorenzos in the area.

During the journey, Sophie found herself falling for Charlie – a skeptic in the name of love. Short story, Claire finally reunited with her long lost love. Sophie came back to New York with her fiancé and realized she didn’t love him after all. She later returned to Verona to attend Claire and Lorenzo’s wedding and started a new chapter with Charlie. Happy Ending!

Women everywhere around the globe, all ages and backgrounds, are searching for the kind of love that Sophie experienced. We all want a happy ending story like Sophie’s, but how many of us ever experienced true love? Some of us are stuck in a relationship with men who don’t appreciate us, who treat us like shits, take us for granted, lay their hand on us, or simply never pop up the question.

Sometimes we question ourselves – does true love exist? Does destiny really happen? In the movie, Sophie mentioned to Charlie: “It’s destiny that brought me to you.” Sophie is a classic example of modern women these days – she’s got a career, found her perfect partner, and hoping to walk down the aisle with the love of her life.

Realistically, things don’t always go according to what you’ve planned. When you find yourselves stuck in a rut or things are not working like you’d imagined, you need to take immediate decision for your life.

Dating, heartache, loneliness, depression, losing self esteem are just a phase that we need to go through before finding happily ever after. If you felt that you’ve dated far too many jerks and get your heart all mashed up, chances are you’ll be quite resentful and hopeless about finding true love. It’s not an easy task but we need to keep positive of what’s ahead of us. We need to believe that better things will await us. Throughout my experience, I learn that the more you get your heart broken, the more you discover yourself better. You realize what you want in a relationship and in time will attract the ones you have in mind.

Finding yourself jumping in the dating maze after series of brokenhearts is not fun, it’s rather scary. The trick is to treat dating like a game to reach the million dollar prize. You are not alone in the dating jungle so don’t feel like a loser if you haven’t found your true love yet. After all, not all women are as lucky as Sophie.

Remember.. dating is an elimination process and there’s a huge prize waiting to be claimed on the other end. Every dating failure is a journey, and every asshole you meet will eventually lead you to the right one. And always… always love yourself first before others!

xx