Dating After Divorce – How Do You Date Again When You Have Kids?
Dating after divorce is can be quite a challenge. However, this challenge is further amplified when you put kids in the picture. Being divorced and having kids may complicate dating even more, but that should not stop you from dating again. So, how do you do dating after divorce with kids?
You have to plan and decide how much and what information to share with your kids.
When thinking about sharing your dating information with your kids, you must consider their age, as this will determine how they will understand and absorb the matter presented before them. If you have an older child or a teenage child, you can keep them in the loop by talking to them regarding your thoughts about dating once more. Ask them about their opinion on it.
What should you expect?
However, be prepared, as they may not be accepting it initially. They may get resentful or even angry at the idea. On the other hand, younger kids may be able to accept easier. Other children may need more convincing as well as have more time in adjusting to the idea of you dating again. You know your children better. If you feel that dating again would trigger anxiousness, just keep it for yourself in the meantime.
Inform your date about your kids.
There is no need to pretend that you are single or that you do not have any kids. Any relationship started out this way may be doomed to fail. Besides, telling your partner that you have kids can also help you determine how much he really feels for you. If he is serious with you, he should be willing to accept the people that are very precious to you.
What should you expect?
You can expect that your partner might get all freaked out initially since some are not prepared to handle kids. In this case, you can inform your partner that you are willing to hear out what he or she has to say about the situation as well as what they are feeling about it.
Decide if you really like the person that you are dating.
You have to first be decided if you are into your date. If you are not serious in dating the person, do not introduce them to your kids yet as it may complicate matters in the long haul.
Plan and Think about the Introduction Well
So, as soon as you feel that your date is going well, you can think about and plan the introduction to your kids. You do not need to be too formal on this one so you can ease the tension from both parties. You can introduce your kids to your date at home while you are preparing for food. You can let them sit comfortably on your couch so they can talk to each other. Make everything as casual as possible so it will not seem like it is a big deal.
Prepare more bonding time.
You can prepare more activities where your date and your kids can have more bonding time. This will give them more time to get to know each other. You also have to let your kids know that your date is trying to be a good friend to them and that he or she is not replacing your kids’ mother or father.
Make sure to also have bonding time alone with the kids and alone with your date.
While it is good that you try to set up a bonding time for all of you together, you must also set up some bonding time alone with the kids and alone with your partner. This will give both parties a feeling that no one is stealing you from them. Having quality time with your kids will make your bond as parent and child stronger. On the other hand, having some bonding time with your partner will make your relationship stronger.
You may do some alteration to these methods so you can effortlessly date even when you already have kids. It may require more time compared to dating when you are single, but as soon as everything goes out smoothly, it will be a bliss.